Are the holidays hard for you? If so, you are not alone.
If you’re someone who suffers while others are celebrating, you’re probably carrying an added burden of believing you’re “supposed to” feel some other way.
And that only reinforces your feelings of loneliness and adds to your misery.
What we’re really talking about is grief.
People tend to think of death when we use the word “grief,” but the truth is that any kind of loss can trigger grief and everything that can go along with it.
Your grief is as unique as a fingerprint.
Whether it was a bad break-up or a difficult divorce; an unexpected medical diagnosis or a chronic illness; the exhaustion of caregiving for an aging parent; or the myriad losses that go along with recovery from addiction or codependency, all kinds of losses can become amplified in this season where images of wholeness and expectations of happiness are projected, larger than life, just about everywhere you go.
The experience of grief is universal
There is a universality to the human experience of grief. Because everyone loves. And every person has had or will have the experience of losing what they have loved. Thus every person, at some time in their life, will grieve. Whether you’re grieving your own loss, or wanting to support someone else who is grieving, it’s all about how to “be there” for yourself, for another person, or both.
There are ways to deal with the holiday season, to cope with whatever comes up for you, to get through it all with less wear and tear on your spirit… and maybe even to enjoy yourself, even just a little bit.
You have a right to your sorrow. And, you deserve the joy of simple, present-tense pleasures.
During this holiday season, and the rest of the year too, remember to have the intention to balance your right to honor your feelings that aren’t so jolly with your right to experience a little here and now pleasantness despite your sadness, your anger or regret, your sorrow… in short, your grief.
Click below listen to the podcast I made for you about the challenge of getting through the holidays.